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"I'm not staring into space, I'm breaking the fourth wall."

In his younger days Spock was quite the comedian.

This is Lenny the leopard with the on-the-spot news.

"Why didn't you simply open the window?"

"I don't know if I can do 'Gilmore Girls' today. I'm not sure I'm feeling up for anything involving witty yet poignant repartee."

'Straight eye for the queer guy.'

"The first week of school is just review. You know. Scenes from last year's episode."

'Time for my favorite soap opera, Nine Lives to Live.'

"The X files...the tooth is out there"

"Thanks Dave. I don't know about you folks, but I can feel it coming in the air tonight."

"Guess who's going to be on national television apologizing to the American public."

"What am I doing? Just sitting here binge binging."

'Sorry, viewers, I was going to show you one I made earlier but it's been scoffed by the second assistant sound engineer.'

'They're clouds, Bob. You can't channel surf.'

'We need more cake shows!'

Good Morning Britain has just achieved something previously thought impossible...by making Piers Morgan the most likeable man on screen.

'I stopped watching Sesame Street the second I found out it was educational.'

Ostrich TV.

"I think it's important to remember that he isn't gone forever. He's still alive. He just played a character on TV who died."

"Head for the hills! It's the Apocalips!"

'If we lose the malpractice lawsuit, we can always sell it to the Bloopers Channel.'

"How about that! Wanda, you also landed on cheese."

'The actress who kept her clothes on in a TV drama.'

"My name's Aldred and I'll be your server this evening."

"This i why I always dress in bright colors."

Mensans Behaving Badly

"Why are these reality show stars so famous? They're sneaky! They're conniving! They're evil!"

"Next on... Auto Mechanic M.D. Your knees are shot, so I'm going to try injecting some grease. If that doesn't work, I'll make you new knees from some shock absorbers."

"Well... Can't say I'm surprised!"