Tv Mini-series Fan Gifts

“The jury has requested you pitch your case in the style of a six-part TV mini-series.”

In his younger days Spock was quite the comedian.

Proud of herself for "never owning a tv" Emily watches eight episodes of a mediocre tv show on her laptop while in bed.

'Straight eye for the queer guy.'

"It's your final warning...Quit playing the 'Beverly Hillbillies' theme song"

TV Situations vacant.

'With the kind cooperation of the underworld, we present live, for the first time on TV, an actual holdup.'

Clive Anderson

'I've seen nothing I've liked since Victor Meldrew!'

Moses' TV guide.

"Well, now we know what Letterman's doing, what are we doing?"

"The X files...the tooth is out there"

"Thanks Dave. I don't know about you folks, but I can feel it coming in the air tonight."

'Sorry, viewers, I was going to show you one I made earlier but it's been scoffed by the second assistant sound engineer.'

News Wear World

Liz Hurley

I lost as a contestant on the quiz show, but they gave me this lovely parting gift...

It's on. My new favorite game show! Welcome to: Garbage, recycling or compost?! Dana from New York you can walk away with $10,000 or try to double the green! Double, please. Okay, Dana, here's your object: A takeout container from a local restaurant. Garbage, recycling or compost? Geez. I'm guessing it would depend on whether it's got some cardboard or it's fully biodegradable. Final answer? Recycling. Wrong. Garbage! I knew it. Ridicule her! You've lost your green, loser! I'm sorry. I try so ha

Good Morning Britain has just achieved something previously thought impossible...by making Piers Morgan the most likeable man on screen.

'I stopped watching Sesame Street the second I found out it was educational.'

"Popular astrologer and psychic Malder Tercado's contract with a national Spanish-language TV network was not renewed. Tercado was reportedly surprised by the news...saying he didn't see it coming."

'Well, it WAS worth nine thousand dollars. Sorry about that.'

Tommy Cooper

Ostrich TV.

"This i why I always dress in bright colors."

Ronni Ancona.

'On the Highway of Life, Broderick Crawford is always pulling me over.'

'I'd like to buy a towel.'

99 Dalmations - Edited for television.

'If you smiled in the mornings, you'd come up in the ratings, too.'

Police officer does a puppet show for a child.

'Too much TV, maybe. Is there a John Wane marathon going on?'

"How about that! Wanda, you also landed on cheese."

'If we lose the malpractice lawsuit, we can always sell it to the Bloopers Channel.'

'I'm no Einstein, but I play one on TV!'