Tv Marathoner Gifts

A monk watches TV in his zen garden.

"Let's see what's going on in the world."

"I would suggest watching fewer box sets..."

"Now that I can watch whatever I want, whenever I want, my life has no structure."

'Are you sure sitting on a bean bag chair isn't considered getting a daily requirement of vegetables?'

Birthday To-Do List

"So. . . you're binge-watching Scandinavian noir to cheer yourself up?"

"From now until October, he'll be quiet as a pussycat."

"I don't know why you keep pressing the remote control..."

'Dude, it's been four hours since the frenzy and you're still burping that stuff up? That regurgitated rubber smell from those paddles is downright nasty!'

'The Degeneration Game'

'Just as I thought...you can't collect on the life insurance by boring me to death.'

World Cup: 'Darren's peaking too early - it's only the opening ceremony.'

'I would've done my homework, but they kept saying 'stay tuned'.'

'They're not out of town. They just watch entirely too much television.'

'Actually on a molecular level, I'm quite active.'

'Because it's my New Year's resolution. That's why I sit here all the time.'

"So, what'll it be...binge watching, binge eating or both?"

"Shouldn't you be studying?

"We interrupt this endless stream of mind-numbing adverts to bring you a TV programme..."

"I wonder which will come first. Me finishing this binge worthy Netflix series or another Netflix rate hike."

"It's time to get the couch gutters cleaned again."

Stress Prison - The fictional jail you imagine being sent to so you can catch up with Netflix and reading.

"Well, I guess this means we'll have to start feeling our own pain again."

"This is his fifteenth successive Olympics."

"Help! Save us, procrastination man!"

"Let's finish off our night of being productive by starting another season."

"Blood pressure 210/140. Heart rate 185. Steps taken 29. Sedentary 9.5 hours. Calories burned 19. You da man! Oh, and you're out of pork rinds." "Our classics TV marathon featuring 'Gunsmoke' will continue after..." "The unfitbit"

"I guess the tux is just another brave act of resilience. I also spilled beans on my sweats."

"I'll wait for the universe to end and the binge watch it."

"Next time say to your wife...'Yes darling I'd love to watch another 6 hours of Wimbledon'."

'At home with the blue-arsed flies 2009.'

"I don't believe in Out-Of-Body experiences, but Frank regularly has Out-Of-Mind episodes."

'I've gotta go to the john. Have you seen my travel mug?'

'Dad, is this like ... you doing your own thing?'