Tv Commercial Collector Gifts

'That Energizer Bunny has gone too far this time! -- interrupting a pantyhose commercial!'

"No, it wasn't a sinkhole. Your old TV was so heavy the ground could no longer take the weight."

"The following film has been formatted to fir the screen of the newer and more expensive television set."

Stop! Stop what? Do not change the channel! Sex, death, harrowing footage of the most remarkable story you've ever seen, tattoos, rock-n-roll, action, action, action! It's all coming right up, right after this five second break for station identification. Five seconds ... You're watching Rock Television. And now back to our ... bored. Welcome to ABC. We've got thrills, action, more thrills ... Click. I've got your action right here. We've created a monster. Click click click click click cl-

'Come quick: Rin Tin Tin is on TV again...'

Beef stew 50c. (In a bowl - $1.75)

'I don't have any formal training, but I do own the complet boxed set of 'Get Smart' DVD's.'

". . . yes, sir, folks . . . and furthermore, folks . . . for real quality, folks . . . yes, sir, folks . . ."

Barry Norman

'I'm a voice over artist.'

"Gap... Tony Soprano fit"

"I love this comedy. What's it called?"

"God, I love this show!"

'Of course he's an actor. When was the last time you saw a kid enjoy something that was good for him?'

The Magic Float

Stephen Harper on the attack ads.

"Play it like, sure, the world sees you as just a hamburger, but you know there's so much more to you than that."

TV dinners: regular and widescreen

Before we begin tonight's dream, a word from our sponsor...

'Hey! -- that Maytag repairman is an impostor!'

'When you caught yourself saying the repetitive never-ending TV commercials and couldn't stop doing it, you should have come to see me then!'

'I love it, the chief loves it. The client loves it but the Gods don't love it.'

"Why not try chocolate? ...and be just like the Pros!"

TV Guide: Cowboy Cowboys.

"Has this ever happened to you? Well, with our Medical Emergency Distress System..."

'Okay, I'll do one more dog food commercial, but I don't want to get typecast.'

'...But the good news is TV ads have been promoting the idea that money isn't everything.'

Where Are They Now?

'Your entire library consists of nothing but TV Guides bound in Corinthian leather?'

"None of 'em is my type. I'm sitting on my hands this year."

"You know that drug commercial where everyone is laughing and running around with friends and dogs enjoying the beautiful day? What are they on?"

'Yummo Toothpaste contains no caffeine, and cleans your teeth better than Coke or Pepsi!'

"Play the old Winston jingle."

Russell Brand dating Geri Halliwell.

Did the Chinese invent junk mail?