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Sofa King: Where our prices are sofa king low!

'I wouldn't say this wine's name is long, but it's continued on the bottle next to it.'

"These are the very weapons your mother and I used in our famous duel."

News and Magazines. Celebrity gossip. Sports scandals. Political bickering. We're out of the "information age" and well into the "too much information age"!

'It's genuine 17th century satsuma - and the pair would have been worth ?14,000.'

'Heirloom Tiffany Lamp Delivery. I Brake for Everything.'

"This new phone app for opening the beer is great, Bruce!"

His cubicle had come to be known as 'Teddy Bear Heaven'.

Beef stew 50c. (In a bowl - $1.75)

'...So you claim this is genuine Rembrandt?'

'... Going once...going twice...aaaand--sold! To the gentleman in the front row for a thousand words.'

The other digital divide.

"Twenty-five thousand, do I hear thirty thousand? Let me remind you all - this is the last Thin Mint cookie in the sleeve..."

As Seen Watching TV

'It's amazing! I'm a magician! I can make a weekly wage disappear in four hours!'

"Percy Shattock, Page Three Girls...1979 to 1986."

"Fetch, Ernie, fetch!"

'We suspect death by Sunday supplement.'

Horace Greeley's Storm Battered Coat and Hat

"What's that smell?" "A paper cut."

"Hey, Dad, guess what? My Honus Wagner baseball card is worth $2.1 million!"

A cat spells out Google in its litter box.

"It's a flip phone. I guess we can document this as an ancient, archaeological discovery."

"I'm sorry, I can't assist with this request."

"I wonder what this was for."

"After six weeks of camping out here to observe our operations, the design firm has created a new logo. It's our company's name in blue lower-case letters."

'How old is this vase?'

"I never expected you to pay through the nose."

"Hmm interesting Hallmark..."

'...but the good new is your old Enron stock has become a high-priced collectible!'

'Your entire library consists of nothing but tabloids bound in Corinthian leather?'

Pawnshop: Genuine Fake Watches.

'Stamp auction' WW2 Victory stamps on two fingers

'Your baseball card has more value than you do.'

'To you, fifty quid - c'mon guv, it's HANDMADE!'