Turkey Pardoner Pillows

"Have you considered the carbon footprint that roasting a turkey creates?"

Are you the guy who ate my brother?

'It's not what you think. It's not about our liberation.'

"The last one is Uncle Charlie. He was pardoned in 1987."

'When they start calling you a splendid bird, you know you're in trouble.'

Before and After Holiday Diet

'You broke your wishbone. I'd suggest making a wish.'

Holiday Overkill.

"What the ... they've scheduled my surgery for Thanksgiving."

T is for Turkey

"This'll be our first Christmas together."

"Oops! MY mistake, that was the yearly expense estimate, not the monthly estimate."

'Do you think they'll feed us something special for Christmas dinner?'

'I survived four Thanksgivings. I deserve to accompany you on the Veterans' Parade!'

"I hope I can make this work, with Thanksgiving just around the corner."

"You poor thing. Let's get you cleaned up."

'CAN I RECOMMEND BAKED CHICKEN WITH MUSHROOMS AND CHESTNUT PUREE? YOU DON´T KNOW HOW TASTY IT IS.'

"Are you the guys who ate my brother!?"

I'm afraid I'm going to have to disciplines you, counselor. No problem, your honor. I just happen to have some furry handcuffs in my pocket.

"We'd like to promote the concept of a nontraditional Thanksgiving."

Turkey with an ax to grind.

'Some country that doesn't have Thanksgiving!'

Turkey pardoned by Trump still faces state charges.

'If I find you're hiding my escaped prize Christmas turkeys there'll be hell to pay!'

"These images clearly show we were here long before mankind."

"I quit."

"How'd you manage to get so many tickets?"

Refugees Fleeing Ethnic Roasting Somewhere Along Rt. 67, Connecticut

"Should we worry that the farmer "liked" our selfie, and commented about how delicious we look?"

"Well, it's time to head off for the holidays."

'Don't give me that innocent look.'

'Do you have any 'Congratulations on Your Presidential Pardon's' cards?'

'I'd like to spend November and December in a foreign country.'

Thanksgiving and Truthsgiving

"This year, I'm ready."