Tumbleweed Tamer Gifts

"There's tumbleweed coming out of your computer screen. Now do you believe your website is like a ghost town?"

'Ah! This is the Texas I remember!'

'Let the creepy crawly hunt begin!'

On August 14, 2011 at app. 2:00 p, Derek Winslow made scientific history by converting an item of the animal kingdom into an item of the plant kingdom.

Dear Santa, please can I have a powerful herbicide for Christmas. Best wishes, Adam.

'The hair specialist is down the hall.'

His New Grillfriend

"Okay - who wants theirs well done?"

"He won't stop and ask for directions when he COOKS, either."

Not you. Your hair.

"Lovely dovetail."

"So, who would you like me to call first, dear, the plumber or the exterminator?"

I love Science.

'How do you like your steaks? Scorched, burnt or cremated?'

Getting Rid of the Cure

"Who like 'em well done?"

Believe it or not, I'm sitting her watching the fights. Harry versus the crabgrass, the moles, the insects...

"Slide, Howie!!! Slide!"

"I wish he'd slow the hell down." "I wish he'd hurry the hell up."

Atomic Bear: Part 5

Getting the Christmas Tree Home.

"When Stan's barbecuing nothings ever 'well done'."

"Shall I phone the fire brigade yet."

'Continue gently simmering for ten minutes...'

"I'm calling it Cajun Blackened Chicken!"

Clown uses skirting flower to prevent hot foot

Yeah, ok. I'll hold onto the two termites until this is over.

Golf Hil Divot

Using plant pots to reach inaccessible object

"Anybody know how make fire?"

"If we don't find a place to charge these batteries we ain't gettin' this herd of tumbleweed to Kansas City by sundown."

Care to BBQ with genius inventor?

'He may be a brilliant academician, but he's even dumber than the rest of us when he tries to do anything practical around the house.'

Recycling point.

Joe was so poor, his dog was a tumbleweed.