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Who Inspires the Nuts?

"Now, were those friends of your Gettys or Gottis?"

"Talk, Wallace - where'd you hide the loot?"

'I'm sure that the autopsy will confirm it was a suicide.'

I understand that our cat Magus died. I miss her a lot. But I wish my parents wouldn't tiptoe around it. House of Java.net Cybercafe. You don't have to watch Youtube clips of CSI: Miami to understand that death is a part of life. The thing I don't understand about our cat's death is, who would've killed her and left a mountain of unresolved clues that only a crack forensics team can figure out? Where were you at 8:45 p.m.? The Youtube Generation grows up fast.

OK! I promise that the questions will be easy!

"True crime meets reality TV"

"So, just to be clear: the 'voices inside your head' told you to launder the money from forfeited law enforcement seizures in exchange for federal tax breaks for your Uncle Mark in Costa Rica?"

"Number 2. Step forward please."

"Since he's been a plagiarist, committed perjury and runs a Ponzi scheme, trust can be an issue."

The Big Book of Suspicious Crawl Spaces

"I worked hard, I played hard and I embezzled hard."

Truman Capote

Crime in bookshop

"Why not stay with your mother and me? The Feds will never find you here."

'Your honor, I'd like a short recess so my client can make a run for it.'

"I'm not leading the witness; I'm winding up my segment on heinous crimes!"

"A major crime publisher is interested in publishing your homework!"

'It's heartbreaking to see Reynolds in trouble for fraud again, but I always look forward to his rooftop chases.'

Madoff and devil.

Book Thief in True Crime Department

'Looks like the victim was trying to tell us something,'

"Undiagnosed serial killer"

911: Would You Like Us To Commit a Crime?

"I couldn't finish that book either."

The Investigation

Ancient Egyptian crime scenes.

"3:14 p.m. Suspect drives to lakeside resort. Rents rowboat under false name. Tosses evidence into... wait, how do I tell anyone?" Topper: Undercover police dog

"Convicts selling novels from prison? At least that could never happen here, eh Jones?"

'Sure we've got a lot of anger. We also got a lot cement.'

'I've written a poem describing my feelings on discovering the body, Inspector...'

"I believe this is a case for Sherlock Holmes..."

"Don't worry, honey. This is just for our murder podcast."

'So far we don't have any suspects.'

Arrest of La Tuta