Troubleshooting Titan Pillows

'I tried to find out if I could toast bread with the sun bed and fell asleep...!'

'What we've got here is a failure to communicate.'

'I don't like our new copier, it sliced my report into hundreds of tiny strips.'

Where was I?

'Don't tell me how much you love me. Tell me how my stock is going.'

Press Any Key. No, Not That One.

"Try unplugging it and throwing it out the window."

Paint/Paint Remover, Glue/Glue Remover...

"We've run all the technical stuff and found the cause of the funny sound coming from your computer."

Kevin had a computer virus.

Please stand by...I have temporarily lost my reason.

"I think we could work very well together."

You have 10 updates, 6 slow your PC down, 3 look very dodgy, 1 randomly changes all your PC settings!

'A 'pregnant pause' is effective only if you've already said something.'

"Have you tried turning off your conscious mind and then turning it back on again?"

'Hurry, it's having a nervous breakdown!'

"It's the age-old question of our existence, Bill: 'Why does bad data happen to good computers?'"

Wha about trying another antivirus?

"Turn down the bass."

'I made a substitute in the recipe. Take-out.'

Socially responsible kid throws rubbish in the bin.

"As a last resort Tom's trying a mind-meld!"

"The Help Desk guy says to try Ctrl-Alt-Delete....!"

Congratulations for male runner

"She's also the only one who knows how to unjam the copy machine."

"Do you have any idea who it is you're talking to?"

'The computer's down again.'

Cut out and keep your own IT expert.

'It's one of those viruses that corrupt every damn thing.'

'Welcome to the rat race.'

'We need a memory upgrade ourselves to remember all these passwords.'

"Have you tried turning it off and on again?"

Monitor Reads: Now You've Done It! AAIIIIEEE...

"And for my next trick, I will attempt to work on this PC for ten minutes without it crashing!"

'Remember, I deduct one grade point for every splinter.'