Trophy Collector Pillows

"We lost!"

The Victors

'You seem upset. Is it because I took down our wedding photo, and replaced it with a photo of a buck I got last week.'

"......And finally I'd like to thank my 5 brothers, 4 sisters, 3 uncles, 2 aunts, 23 nephews and nieces and 37 cousins."

'I'll covet this trophy right up to the time I sell it to met my payroll.'

"I suppose you're gonna be talking GOLF all evening!"

'These represent all of the career milesones I passed on my way to the top. Each trophy was created to my exacting specifications. Each picture, with world leaders, was carefully crafted using advanced phot-editing software.'

'And now I'd like to name this month's recipient of the Dumbest Global E-mail Award...'

Coulda, shoulda, woulda... DID!

'I finished last, but I was the only one who passed the drug test.'

Cat show success.

'He thinks he's a show dog.'

Radiology: 'Numbskull of the month' award.

The White Whale Mounted On The Wall

'You said I had to sell it, you didn't say I couldn't buy it.'

'It was Oscar's final request.'

Husband sleeping with trophy he won.

'That was taken after I lost everything.'

'Did I mention that Sam won the marathon today?'

Devils Heads As Trophies

'Actually, he bought the thing on eBay!'

'Only plaque I ever got was from forgetting to floss.'

Patient can't find help at doctor office window because of awards.

'Guess what? I won again.'

Winners of the math contest for Dyscalculics

He had proudly displayed it on his mantel for seven years fore he finally read the fine print.

"Here's your participation trophy, sir - It's all part of tax reform."

'That one I got in my daughter's bedroom!'

'I know it's your best round ever, but did you really have to enlarge the scorecard that much?'

'...and this trophy is for going shopping for school clothes!'

It's all about number 1.

Old man dusting bodybuilding trophies.

The one that got away

Dog Hunting Trophies.

'...It's moments like these I'm glad I don't have feelings...'