Trinket Hunter Pillows

"I want to travel the world, bringing home ugly little trinkets."

"Don't worry about your purchase not working. Everything we sell here is totally non-functional."

"I'm not here to slay you. I'm here to talk to you about diversifying your investment portfolio."

"Is this the best investment strategy you could come up with?"

'It's a note...It says I.O.U. one pot of gold.'

Pirate Squirrels Looking for Buried Treasure

"It says: 'The teamwork that got you here is the real treasure.' Aww."

The Dubloon Stops Here

"I think I just solved my cash flow problem."

With Thorssen, it's "Pillage and blunder".

"Sorry lad, ye can't be having' me pot o' toilet paper."

My coach wants me to go to soccer camp. Focusing on one sport isn't good for you. But mom! I'll develop crucial life skills. Let's see. "Landing endorsements, agents and college sports scholarships." The definition of "crucial".

"That's not you talking, Justin, that's the sugar talking."

"You're lucky someone was nice enough to turn it in."

"Can you believe you left your job and family to search for this key, and it was under here the whole time?"

'Do you think we should tell anyone about this?'

'This is the BEST well we've dug!!'

Hey, I think I found something. Heavy metal detector.

"I love these old decorations!"

When Tia Carmen says... "I got it for a very good price!" it means...she stopped at a garage sale on the way home.

"It's too late for Jim. The tchotchkes have him now."

Man to other about fish on wall: Heh - I use that size fish for bait!'

"Yes, it's nice my husband has hoarded a fortune, but it would be nicer if he would let me spend some of it though..."

I.O.U. one pot of gold.

Man commiting suicide finds the treasure at the bottom of the sea.

"1. Flimsig used pallets, old foam 2. Stinkum goat wool 3. Beetup recycled lumber 4. Riskig kerosene lamp 5. Stupor hand blown by Nils 6. Smokum found on beach in Mendocino 7. Woblig 100% driftwood"

"Did you check the little patch of grass by the swing set?"

"Actually, I used them as collateral for a loan."

Pirate

'What kind of filling would you like?'

Unbeknownst to most, dogs are actually greedy bastards searching for gold,

"It's from the local micro brewery..."

'We grow our food, have solar energy, use bikes instead of car...now if we could only stop buying knickknacks!'

"Awwwk! Mutiny is a go! Pass it on! Awwk!"

Archaeologists discover a football