Trick-or-treat Enthusiast Pillows

"Here are some broccoli florets - for you and you and you!"

"How did I become someone who has a screaming fit about a stupid gift bag filled with little plastic things?"

'My bag had a hole in it so I ate all my candy.'

'Looked like a doggie bag to me.'

'Wow, given the fall in price and demand for road gravel, getting a rock really hurts.'

'Let's skip Mr. Arnold's house. He's the dog catcher.'

'Burl! Why did you put the spider web on our door?!. . . Now the trick-or-treaters can't get their candy!'

"I did share! I gave Dougie all my melted candy."

"It was a lousy Halloween haul. I didn't have to go for even one dental checkup."

Halloween Bummer: Lady giving out pennies

Monster Baseball. The team's continuing to have some problems this season. Jekyll is good one day and bad the next. Dracula only shows up for night games. The Mummy is always covered in bandages and on the injured list. And King Kong can't keep his mind on the game --- Whenever he sees a pretty woman, he climbs up into the stands after her! At least Frankenstein has been pitching great again, just like when he was young! Yeah, he has a completely new arm!

Transylvanian backpackers.

"Hey! Where's that black cat? My ride's ready!"

'Good news - basic black is being shown this season.'

"What are you looking at, four eyes?"

A spider is afraid of another spider's mask.

Night of the Zombonies.

The witch of the west again showed no water usage for the month.

"If you wish to manifest here, you'll have to change. We don't allow anything past 1950."

Zombies.

Woodpecker carving pumpkins

"The Monster Mash wasn't just about having fun. We were protesting Vietnam."

"I'm spooked - they don't want candy, they want ice water!"

'Awesome mummy costume!' 'I'm a pirate! Some kids just TPed me...'

"800 years old?!! - Gosh... you must be feeling very 'long-in-the tooth."

"Of course I'm dressed like a cheap w***e! It's Halloween! Duhh!"

"You're ruining our reputation, Bob!"

Trick or Tweet

"Alexa, play Thriller by Michael Jackson."

"Sorry. My blood sugar has just been running a little low lately."

"Its been on the market for over two years. The estate agent reckons it's something to do with negative edibility!"

"Where can I find the lefts?"

Open House of Horrors

"And this Halloween, try not to make a specter of yourself."

'Hey, what am I, chopped liver?'