Trendy Mishap Admirer Pillows

"New jeans? - No, cat attack."

"OK, well, if you do hear anything, be sure to give us a call."

OPERATING ROOM, 'Your husband may have a little trouble sleeping for awhile -- we spilled some coffee in him.'

Woman finds something in her soup.

F&E Designs. My reversible jacket didn't turn out very well.

'Eject! Eject, eject eject!! Aw crimony. I've hit the button 6 or 7 times, Cap'n. And the darned CD still won't come out.'

"Sorry I'm late: I was hitching a ride but when the driver noticed me, he panicked and we had an accident..."

"Call the inspector and tell him to cancel today, that something has come up."

Girl knocks over artists who is trying to sketch her.

'Next time make sure it's the bath plug before you pull it out.'

"Sorry about the reception, Lou. I grabbed my enchilada by mistake."

"Ted! It's fallen down! Ted!"

A painter paints his thumb, not the nude model in front of him.

"Michael Bolton at Folsom Prison"

Vern left his weed on the couch again. Bad for Vern. Good for Scooter.

"Excuse me - where did you get your romper?"

Campanology wasn't really Gregory's thing!

"I tell you the computer in the hospital made a mistake!"

'Bruce, your dingleberry's ringing'

'Oh, sorry...so you ordered a steak sandwich?'

"I don't like sweetcorn".

'No.'

Harpist slicing fingers on strings

"Sorry, I haven't had chance to watch much TV since I went to turn down the radio, tripped over a magazine and a framed poster fell on my head..."

Golf Cart Punctures

The Off-Tones

'Sarge - I think I've thrown my mobile!'

'You were right - it WASN'T a cat with a racing stripe.'

House Painter: Oh great, what a day. Now I've got another stocking in my ladder!

I hate karaoke nights.

This was one time Joe regretted being an expert at bird song.

Hey Siri, dictate a note. What would you like to say? Shhh!!! Whisper, Siri! I'm trying to dictate an article about our hostage-takers without them hearing I'm a journalist. I'm sorry. I didn't quite get that. He said "I'm trying to dictate and article about our hostage-takers without them hearing I'm a journalist." Thanks.

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This end up - You idiot.

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