Tree Fort Building Gifts

'Is this better?'

"I built this tree house for my kids. But it's so private, I've decided to use it as my home office."

'Call for you on the cream corn line.'

'Don't feel bad — all tree huggers get a splinter now and then.'

Intelligent people laugh too!

"...and the humans turned Neville into 80,000 toothpicks..."

"Do you know any other songs besides the theme to The Andy Griffin Show?"

Tree house.

"Can you tell the oak tree to tell the birch tree to tell the elm tree I said hi?"

Selfie Stick

"I'm still looking for the lap of luxury."

'I love cutting trees in perfect circles because it drives aerial photography interpreters crazy.'

'Some of these trees have been here for 2000 years... and they still can't talk. Man, we're awesome!'

'The forest is so dark and gloomy: It's nice to reach the emergence and get a bit of sunshine...'

Hermit Crabapple Tree

"It's just a tree."

How Rings In Nature Indicate Aging.

"I got ninety-nine problems, but a birch ain't one!"

“Hey Everyone! It’s the first day of Fall! Okay, you go first!”

Tree Passion

Dracula acquires a taste for maple syrup.

"Oh, quit your whining. At least yours comes back in the Spring

Stop and Birch

"Promise me that if I die first you won't eat me."

'I'm afraid I'll fall and no one will hear me.'

'I'm concerned that the children may be playing too rough.'

'I hope it;s an express.'

Tree Mobsters. 'I didn't hear anything. Did you hear anything?' 'I didn't hear anything.'

The bluebird of passive-aggressiveness

'Vanity, thy name is Maple.'

'So, that's how squirrels find their buried food?'

"We're trying to help you!"

"Pride, Covetousness, Lust, Anger, Gluttony, Envy..."

A tree cries its leaves off like tears

Fall fashions