Travelling Salesperson Gifts

"I understand he's here on a business trip."

'It's only a hunch, but I think everybody bought everything they needed, last time.'

'I think you are taking this elevator pitch way too literally'.

"Well, ordinary men have colleagues. Successful men have victims."

Larry's used art

Kiosk in large lobby with sign above it labeled 'Empathy'.

'When we get there let me do the double talking.'

"The data looks good, sir, but the vibes are mucho heavioso."

'Our product flooded the market... Before backing up a deluge of consumer complaints!'

Two children are running lemonade stands outside their home; one stand is more popular than the other.

"In recognition of last month's little upward blip, I suggest we allow ourselves a spontaneous victory fist bump."

'Quick! We need a bigger chart in here!'

"Now here's one that has the glamour above the table."

'Someplace where we could take lots of selfies with national monuments...'

'The efficiency expert's recommendation is we drink more coffee!'

'So what's it like riding in first class?'

"So, I see you have a background in advertising..."

A woman floats in the pool under the shade of an airplane

"The GPS works great, we have satellite TV installed, the Sirius stereo sounds fantastic and our every move is tracked by Qualcomm. But could you turn around? I left me iphone at the house. . ."

"I said I wanted to visit the Brandenburg Gate."

A treasure map shows you all the roads without tolls.

ACME INDUSTRIES NEW PRODUCTS DIVISION, 'The best part is, it can repossess itself!'

'What zip code are we in now?'

"First class, or with children?"

Winter Coat Check at a Tropical Destination's Airport

"It's kohlrabi, the next hot vegetable."

'This is a 'placebo' line. It serves no purpose but it makes us feel good.'

"Thanks for walking a mile in my shoe but it's beginning to hurt now."

"Great! We're still going up! Chop a hole in the ceiling!"

'I want to visit the very EDGE of civilisation, to explore the BRUTAL shores of natures most REMOTE regions. If you could manage that with a five star hotel and first class travel it would be perfect.'

QUINTUPLE BYPASSES EXPLAINED.

"Unfortunately, the consumer was not as demanding as we had hoped."

"Would you say that the sales projections in your 3 year plan are realistic?"

"So then the VP of Sales looks right at me and says 'Larry, what's going on? We don't have any traction in the market.' Like it's MY fault!"

Toadstools