Traveler With Humor Gifts

"That reminds me. . . did you remember to pack the viagra?"

Carefree luggage.

Leaning Tower -After a bottle, Jean noticed the tower stopped leaning.

Transylvanian backpackers.

Airport Security.

Dear Diary. . . why, oh why, did I choose an adventure holiday?

'Camping is nature's way of promoting B&Bs.'

The Euro-Trash Trashcan

"If God had meant us to fly, he'd give us more leg room!"

'Do you have any specific regulations concerning travelling with pets?'

"Let's see, I make it four suitcases, a rolling bag, and a tote bag... You sure that's enough for our two day trip?"

'Hang on a second, I think I have a sand castle in my shoe.'

Camping holidays in the British summer.

"Didn't you just say that?"

'I'm going to give you something for your depression - it's an airline ticket to the Bahamas!'

'Agreed, 40 years is a long time to wander around, but think of the travel expenses.'

Attack of the Underwear Bomber

'If the GPS has to tell you, 'No, we're not there yet' one more time...'

"I thought they just hibernated for the winter."

Airport Security. Just pass the wand over them, Ernie. Keep your "abracadabras" to yourself.

"We're off. We got a loan to fill er up!"

"My guess it's guacamole."

Limerick Airport

"Rule #1: don't offer to carry anything!"

'This one is a bit different - twelve Indian call centres in eight days.'

'Are we there yet! Are we there yet! Are we there yet!'

'Our trip to Florida was great until Rob took us driving with the dolphins.'

"Well, we did book the Grill Suite I suppose."

Getting out of baggage fees is tricky, another sweater or two and I'd be charged for an extra seat.

Billy strip: comic will make you sick.

The leaning tower of Pizza.

'Your luggage went to Bosnia-Herzegovina, sir, and I'm afraid they're holding it for ransom.'

"Okay, ha ha, now seriously...Where's the rest of the nuts?"

A pocket of pygmies - "Have you anything to declare sir?"

'As a matter-of-fact I didn't pack my own bags...Well,well, well...Speak of the devil!'