Travel Tales Gifts

"So far, my luggage has had a more exciting vacation than I have!"

'What zip code are we in now?'

'Hold on, I'll get the camera.'

Cash Machines From Across the Land

Welcome to Stratford-On-Avon...Birthplace of William Shakespeare...Park not here, lest ye be towed!

"Could you tell me how to get to cedar grove, New Jersey? I want to see where my grandfather was born."

Columbus Discovers that when Exploring, It's Not Such A Great idea to Bring The Family Along.

"I'm heading north but these days it just seems easier to walk."

Airplane food

"And so another trip comes to an end...with family brought closer together by a shared experience."

'Mom! Do they have traffic lights and stop signs in the sky?'

'At least, Men point cameras at you these days: In my day, they pointed guns!'

Face it, Bob, we're lost. Welcome to Faceitbobwe'relost pop. 2.

"You finished with your peanuts?"

"During our vacation my wife and I went to Paris while our suitcases went to Rome and Athens."

'My husband, Bill, works at the airport - I still haven't opened my birthday presents from three years ago.'

Animal immigration

"This next song is about a trip to Vermont. It's called 'This is the whitest state I've ever seen—wow!'"

Welcome to Yosemite, Hell on Earth!

'While our cases were soaking up the sun over there we were soaking up the rain over here!'

"Excuse me... I think you're in my seat."

"Who wants to go first?"

'No we are not there yet, we're just leaving our drive!'

The aviation experts come out to play

"Flight time is approximately 3 seconds and - I won't lie to you folks - it's a bit choppy up there."

'...so then I said 'your camera is stealing my soul' and he said 'I'm so sorry - how can I possibly repay you?''

Monster Souvenir

Traveling abroad from Cuba...

Pussycat says to Owl: 'This is rubbish, can we PLEASE do Ibiza next year?'

'You don't look like your passport photo.'

Caravan and Humpback Bridge

Tourists

'Rumour has it - he upset a 'Witch - doctor' while on holiday in Africa!'

What brings you to Canada? None of your beeswax. Border. Business, pleasure, asylum or melodrama? Huh? Our newest category. Donald Trump eats kittens! Ashton Kutcher. Melodrama, next!

"Excuse me, I just need to raise my arms and expose my bare stomach within about three-quarters of an inch from your face."