Travel Joke Lover Gifts

Countless cookies and glasses of milk don't mix well with Toledo turbulence!"

Carefree luggage.

"Damn. I think I missed the turn for Bethlehem."

Airport Security.

"If God had meant us to fly, he'd give us more leg room!"

"No flight of the Bumblebee"

'I'm going to give you something for your depression - it's an airline ticket to the Bahamas!'

Attack of the Underwear Bomber

"The candy on the pillow is a nicety of the house."

Limerick Airport

Can I have a look at the map?

Getting out of baggage fees is tricky, another sweater or two and I'd be charged for an extra seat.

Sometimes nature not only calls; she makes an emergency breakthrough.

'As a matter-of-fact I didn't pack my own bags...Well,well, well...Speak of the devil!'

'I'm happy to report our use of air sickness bags has declined sharply since we quit serving meals.'

'Yep, another set of incisors that are too sharp for security regulations. You'll need to wear a muzzle during the flight, ma'am.'

"I'm going to Bognor next year!"

Passengers arriving on luggage conveyor belt

1,000 places to see after you die by Shirley Maclaine.

"Well, that's just great! I guess pigs don't fly after all!"

'And remember: just hold up this little green paper, and they will do whatever you want.'

Holiday Luggage

'You have the right to refuse the body scanner, but then I'll have to pat you down.'

Why used clothing should be declared a dangerous weapon...

You're Here. Man, You Really Look Like An Idiot!

"I see you didn't purchase ANY leg room"

Traffic Sign

'I can't talk... I'm in the quiet carriage.' - '3...2...1...' - 'What? I can't hear you... you're breaking up...' - 'Brace! Brace!' - 'I said 'I'm in the quiet carriage'!!!' - 'Irony crash.'

'Well? How was the flight?'

"No, I said, 'You turn here, not, 'U-Turn here'."

'You've been looking for that cuff-link, haven't you? Well...'

"People are way too casual when they fly these days."

The Leaning Tower of Pizza

'We're not going to Roswell again, it's such a tourist trap.'

Alfredo the knife thrower's first air trip.