Transfer Season Strategist Gifts

"He was always a thug... but he used to be our thug."

The MBA Draft

Old navy veteran 3rd base coach

"I don't believe I've missed a single sign since you made the switch to Power Point."

"I've just barbecued my head again."

Perils of the double play.

"Really! How many 'How to Survive the Festive Season' articles does one man need?"

'Let's go over our secret play.'

The Other Cooperstown

'Unbelievable, these guys brought a ringer.'

Baseball Fantasy League Draft. 27 Trout. Everybody wants that rare player who can do it all on their team. Yeah, a player that hits for average and hits for power! Who is also terrific with a glove and has a strong throwing arm. All along with having great speed! Excuse me, I just don't understand it. Why are you always making such a big deal over a five-tool player?!

'I'd better make a note of your blood group...'

"I love fast break business success."

'I'll just put them here until the danger of frost passes - probably next April'

"When you put on the uniform, you surrender a part of yourself."

"If you think it's tough at this level, kid, wait until you get into calculus."

'You are dreaming the impossible team.'

"Fellas, I invited Max here to give us a fresh, millennial take on how to get out of the inning."

"They play union in heaven... where do they play football?"

"The good news is I used AI to fill in my March tournament bracket and I won the whole thing. The bad news is AI has become self aware and wants the prize money."

'Every team needs a role player. And your role on this team, Bill, is to sit at that desk and crunch numbers.'

Baseball Clubhouse Pranks

'Blimey, boss - that's a bit revolutionary, isn't it?'

'..The wolves have got the sheep pinned against their own 1-yard line again!'

'Here's a play my backup QB designed. Everyone goes long and I throw to our opponent.'

"Marketing hired a golf pro as our spokesperson. Finally, we've got someone on the ball around here."

'Think we should be packing up soon, Hon?'

'...and if you guys keep screwing up, I'm gonna have to start kicking some butt!'

"Baseball is way too boring - so, we're doing one inning, winner takes all, everybody go home early and live their lives."

'The score is tied and we've only got a 20-second timeout, so we've gotta be quick. ... I'm 'X'. Who wants to be 'O'?'

'Are you blind ref?'

Rugby - Interesting line-out tactics.

'Since you only work one night a year, it will take centuries to build up your retirement account.'

'I hate PowerPoint.'

'Okay, who knows how to solve for 'X'?'