Trailer Watchers Gifts

Did you see the "Star Wars" trailer? O

"And just like that, e got rid of Florida."

"Let's go watch TV I hear there are bowl games on."

"I've seem an awful lot of movies ever since they cut them all down to two minutes."

Tree house.

This is a great game --- All except for that blimp. It keeps reminding me I've already broken my diet resolution. Pizza. Chips.

I understand that our cat Magus died. I miss her a lot. But I wish my parents wouldn't tiptoe around it. House of Java.net Cybercafe. You don't have to watch Youtube clips of CSI: Miami to understand that death is a part of life. The thing I don't understand about our cat's death is, who would've killed her and left a mountain of unresolved clues that only a crack forensics team can figure out? Where were you at 8:45 p.m.? The Youtube Generation grows up fast.

"For most people, the sense of panic will be mild."

'Och lye the news'

"#notguilty."

Please stand by. As stocks soar, our announcer is having a fit of the giggles.

"Alright. What should we watch first - the Youtube video or the comments below?"

"Would you mind adjusting the vibrate on your phone? There's a seismologist on TV claiming there's been an earthquake in our neighborhood."

"Scientists confirmed today that everything we know about the structure of the universe is wrongedy-wrong-wrong."

'We're there already? I'm still watching my video!'

"WIFI, Amazon, credit cards. Pretty much every password is named after me."

"'If you can't say something nice, don't say it at all' doesn't work with a grand jury."

'Harry! - If you can hear me - what did you do with the remote!?'

Incorrect weather forecasts.

'We the jury find the defendant very, very, very, guilty.'

"Or we could turn on the TV and let younger, more beautiful people have sex for us."

It's a Dog's life

"Let's take in a trial."

"Then we agree. 10 minutes of your news, then 10 minutes of mine."

A throng runs out the courthouse to follow a car that is driving away decorated with a sign that reads "Just Acquitted".

"I'm the bluebird of PMS. Fetch me some decaf and turn on the air conditioner. I'm burning up in here!"

"And how long till they start saying the 'Great' after my name."

"So much for finding intelligent life on this planet."

'The opinions expressed by Burt are not necessarily those of Ernie.'

"Every good scene in that move was in the coming attractions...why did we even bother to come watch it?"

"Today, in all aspects of life losses outnumbered gains."

'According to the latest reports, there were no earlier reports.'

"Can you identify the person who assaulted you and then stole your title?"

'The sword in the stone was just a warm-up - now you must remove this remote control ...'

"No, I'm not doing my homework, but I am watching a YouTube video of someone doing theirs."