Traditionalist Gifts

'She's a new school principal with 'old school' principles.'

Books On Paper

'But father, I don't want to plant corn and raise pumpkins, I want to sell real estate!'

Li'l Bill meets destiny.

"Pencil and paper?! Talk about old school!"

"Father is still old-school when it comes to homeland security."

'You go ahead. We'll rejoin you when you start using new technology.'

'The reason I have no interactive device - like a clicker or beeper - is I'm readng a BOOK,'

"They make us learn reading, writing, and arithmetic to prepare us for a world of videotapes, computer terminals and calculators."

'But why do we have to plough the fields and scatter when we get everything from Tesco?'

Through These Hallowed Halls, walks Our Future - "Talk about putting pressure on a guy!"

Time for Tea!

"String ... you mean it doesn't have a remote controller to operate it?"

'The company wants us to embrace change, but I'd personally prefer a quick handshake.'

"We're pretty traditional around here. I handle everything on the domestic front except security."

"Nothing important—nothing on fax, nothing on voice mail, nothing on the Internet. Just, you know, handwritten stuff."

"Stuffy in here, isn't it?"

Toy Shops and Educated Children

"A paperless society is fine and all, but just in case, I have a couple reams of 24lb. bond stuffed in my mattress."

'Some of these traditions don't half linger on.'

Coffee shop request for tea in china cup.

'What makes you think they're modern fakes?'

Punch and Judy - Soon to be a major motion picture.

'Your father can't come to the phone right now, he's stuck in his ways.'

'Whose shout is it?'

'Smoke signals, sign language, bird calls. . . enough of the social networking!!!'

'Hey, grampa. What's that?'

'You wouldn't catch George & I purchasing off the internet. We much prefer the hustle & bustle of real shopping.'

'This is just a holiday tradition - It's nothing personal.'

'...please switch of all mobile phones, paging devices and alarm watches...'

'Yes, I received it but somehow it doesn't feel the same, displaying e-cards.'

'I like corn the way it is, so I sure hope they don't start forcing ethanol on us.'

Sanity Claus: 'Celebrate the birth of Christ.

"Grandma, are you old technology?"

It's how we've always done it