Traditional Ceremony Buff Pillows

Publishing the banns.

'She's a very protectice mother!' - Lifeguard at Christening/Baptism.

'Okay.. what the hell.'

" ... and peace be with you, although not likely."

'Did you bark, M'Lady?'

',,, and if anyone knows of a reason why these two should not be married, let them storm this castle with pitchforks and torches or forever hold their peace,'

'No, but thanks for asking,'

'The correct response, Tanya, is 'I do' not 'yeah, whatever'.'

Whistler's Great-Great-Great-Great-Great Grandson

'Cheryl, you are getting way too wrapped up in the dog.'

'You will now be presented with your degrees. That is, of course, after you jump through another one of our little hoops.'

'You should have seen the one that got away!'

Folk Wedding

Zumma Cum Laude

"I should cover your ears.I'm not very good at this.'

'Does my head look big in this?'

'Sorry, I always cry at weddings...'

'I bet you could walk down the aisle blindfolded now,eh,Gloria?'

GLAD-YOU-ATION

'They met in a revolving door and started going around together.'

"It's OK vicar, Nigel's just having one of his panic attacks."

"I hate weddings. They make me feel a momentary lapse of cynicism."

A baby being christened in a scuba mask.

"And for only $19.99 I can give you my super bowl pick."

"No bouquet toss for this bride. She's shooting it out of a cannon."

Tribal masks.

'He'll be really p****d if he doesn't get nominated for an award this year.'

'Will you hold it down? This is IMPORTANT!'

'The speaker for tonight's ceremony will be our valedictorian. Speak, boy, speak.'

The most popular Sunday at St Clive's was always the annual 'Blessing of the Smartphones' service.

Confirmation of Westminster School Boys at the Abbey

'And do you, grand marshal Froomkin, promise to always love a parade?'

The wedding cake as Holy Sacrament.

"Just a moment, please. I would like my mother's maiden name included."

'You have your Boxing Day dip and I'II have mine...'