Traders Gifts

Build Your Own Portfolio

The 8.05 to Wall Street.

"The main reason Bob trades on-line is his dumb mistakes remain anonymous."

For the last time, Jenkins, it's FTSE.

'Yes...our chief analyst is recommending further investments in the new year.'

'No, we don't have an exchange traded fund yet for baseball cards or comic books.'

"I don't understand why other countries don't buy our products. After all, they made them!"

Masochism for stockholders.

'Down here, greed is totally unregulated.'

'If you had more criminal potential, you'd get a bonus like all the other investment bankers!'

Save our Bonuses.

'We must grasp this new opportunity'

Who is Goldman and who is Sachs?

"I was going to transmute it into gold, and then I read that the base metal market has made a remarkable recovery!"

Phrenology bust with sections for different currencies.

Late Stage Capitalism and the Biosphere Engage in Some Meaningful Dialogue...

The day the stock market went UP.

"Tariffs love me...tariffs love me not..."

Robot Parts $5

Businessmen trying to prop up a line-chart with sticks

Foreign Markets with Big Barriers

UK/US Free Trade Deal

'Can't they just switch to smaller barrels?'

'The prevailing wisdom is that markets are always right. I think that luck is always right.'

"DeepSeek" "Stargate"

'Honey, where's my cell phone?'

'Looks like your cash cow just got diverted to the slaughterhouse.'

Guy has framed 'first Yuan'

"What do you think I can get for it on the blackboard market?"

"We're pleased to announce that your company has shrewdly traded a cow for some magic beans." some ma

Likes: $2.

'Wavering between being bullish or bearish'

'I found the termites!'

"Hello, son. I suppose chicken farming doesn't seem so bad now."

It's okay Mom! As a broker, I'm under supervision of the SEC!