Trade War Humorist Pillows

"Gas. Regular. Premium. Super. You don’t want to know."

'Pretty strange term, market share, considering the whole object is not to.'

"The fish - will it be the market price at the time of ordering, the time of eating or the time of paying?"

"No, it hasn't, but when the sky does fall your investments are going to do very, very, well.''

Aliens - 'We heard stuff is cheap here.'

"What? You like political cartoons??! You won't get a visa!"

Trickledown economics

Office of economic forecasting.

'Today the stock market closed early so money managers could take time to stop and smell the profits.'

'We buy and sell them.'

Lady Liberty's Self-Care

'It's the NEW Chinese Stock Market Report.'

'Oh dear. I seem to have put the decimal point in the wrong place again.'

General's Coin Toss

Newspaper headline is CUTE PUPPY RESCUED. Cat says: 'Sigh! It's all bad news in the papers, isn't it?'

"The bomb destroys only all life but not object! This means that our troops can have fun plundering and pillaging. War doesn't have to be inhuman, right?"

'Consumer confidence is up.. in the 'Money in the mattress' sector.'

"That man's a legend in this office. He has 100% accuracy in predicting the past."

'Someday, Son, all of this will be yo....!'

Joe Biden

Grand Opening and Closing Down Sale simultaneously occurring.

'President George P. D. Q. ?3 Bush today called for Gulf War VIII'....'

'Great! Thanks to the damn mortage crisis, we've got to live in a neighbourhood now where we wake up with yellow feet every second morning...'

Golf war: 'Fore!'

A day at the UN.

Government Handouts.

Thanks to his stocks, Bob now lives in the middle of a great green garden outside the crowded city.

"Our flag means debt."

'Sorry about the mess -- I've been slashing the Federal budget.'

"These days, many people can only afford to drink from home."

Bad case of credit crunch, I'm afraid, so we'll have to slowly introduce you to a diet of cash.

Office of Management & Budget. Now hiring: crowdfunding expert to reduce the U.S. budget deficit.

"Since it cost as much as our house, can we take out a mortgage instead of a loan?"