Toy Mender Pillows

"We're pretty sure it was the dissolving stitches."

'My mom's the greatest surgeon this side of Mayo brothers.'

'Cat or dog?' - 'A little of both.'

Rocking horse

The Hobby Store

Only a penny! A sensible and ingenious toy for children.

Modern kite for wind energy.

A massive ship pulls in in Central Park.

'No, that wasn't your mother calling to ask if you were okay. That was your mother calling to ask if I was okay.'

"Can you recommend a wine that would compliment a divorce?"

'Because of the mess, 'Mr. Potato Salad-Head' never took off.'

Toys in the DVD Player.

Wait - If this is a big bag of toys, where's the big bag of dirty laundry? Worst Christmas morning ever.

'A few years ago all we needed were some people who could hammer and some people who could paint.'

"It's a fairy simple procedure. We just take out the dead ones and put in two new ones."

'He loves that Lego set we bought for his birthday.'

'The Easter Bunny has started outsourcing to us.'

Parenting Business Deals

Computerized Dollhouse.

'None of the other things had instructions.'

"For the last time… do not feed bubble gum to the reindeer!"

"I like it here but if Santa doesn't get better WiFi I'm getting a new job."

"As I understand it, he has a whole other workshop in Hong Kong where they make all that electronic stuff."

'I need to get away and unwind!'

'I was cleaning my catapult and it went off.'

"I'd like to thank everyone who believed in me."

'There's no fear of him making a Frankenstein's Monster out of this is there?'

Every time I get a postcard from your brother, I regret that I carved him out of driftwood.

'Let me handle this. I'm an orthopedic specialist.'

Broken Heart

"I wasn't ho-ho-ho'ing at you, I was ho-ho-ho'ing with you."

Boss

Remote control car breakdown.

'I'm telling you, I don't have a good feeling about this.'

Doll line: Quality Control - Too Creepy.