Toy Assembly Pillows

Fred began to understand why this kit house was so cheap.

'It says 'turn screw clockwise to tighten.' Which way is clockwise in digital?'

'Because of the mess, 'Mr. Potato Salad-Head' never took off.'

"Young Frankenstein"

Rocking horse

Timmy had one heck of a security blanket.

'Don't bite it.I have to check Daddy next.'

"On the eighth day, God found a lot of assembly parts left over."

Why can't you just chew the squeaker out like normal dogs?

Lego Haircut

"Would you rather get hit by a racket or chewed by a dog?"

'Where do I put the batteries?'

"You need to take this thingamajig...and attach it to the whatchamacallit using a turny thing."

Child makes a toy and frightens himself.

His cubicle had come to be known as 'Teddy Bear Heaven'.

Wait - If this is a big bag of toys, where's the big bag of dirty laundry? Worst Christmas morning ever.

Imagination

'A few years ago all we needed were some people who could hammer and some people who could paint.'

'Just in case there is an accident.'

'He loves that Lego set we bought for his birthday.'

'I think you should seek treatment for that Lego block obsession of yours!'

'The Easter Bunny has started outsourcing to us.'

"They're class action figures."

Caution: use only under child supervison

Jack in the Box

"Jonathan! I've told you not to put your space toys in the freezer and pretend they're on the ice planet!"

"There's no need to be em'bear'rassed about what you like!"

'AQ popgun? I want a field model Browning pump chambered for the 3-inch magnum load.'

Model Nato Afghanistan Army

"This bedtime story is brought to you by your good friends at the toy shop."

Perfection

"Ramming Speed!"

Constructing your own prison!

"I like it here but if Santa doesn't get better WiFi I'm getting a new job."

"For the last time… do not feed bubble gum to the reindeer!"