Tourist Extraordinaire T-Shirts

Ducks Migration Patterns

'I want to visit the very EDGE of civilisation, to explore the BRUTAL shores of natures most REMOTE regions. If you could manage that with a five star hotel and first class travel it would be perfect.'

Viking on beach with rubber ring shaped like viking ship.

"Look, a bug!"

"This is a clever little shop. It makes you think it would be fun to own a lamp."

Nothing like traveling hundreds of miles to immerse yourself in art for the sole purpose of killing time between meals.

"If the economy's ground to a halt, we can help by carrying on shopping."

Heading off with a packed bag

"The guide book sys it's the best B.&B. in the Carpathians."

Convention for People Who Like to Attend Conventions.

The Airport.

"I've got a better view on my smart phone."

Are you interested in UFOs? Advanced life forms? Free medical screenings? Alternative underwear? Snacks and refreshments? Non-sexual turtles? Reverse pound cake? Science? Join us.

Concert pianist with a clockwork piano.

'Where do you keep the elbow grease?'

The Statue of Liberty holding up an ice-cream.

Aliens - 'We heard stuff is cheap here.'

'I prefer to do absolutely nothing on holiday....otherwise the shock's too much when I get back.'

"Fred, just how remote is this remote fishing spot of yours?"

Easter Island Tours. Theories differ. Ernie believes they were used to display a selection of giant wigs.

After her laser surgery, Alice was able to read barcodes without an optical scanner.

"This patient must be really rich! He brought back the most extravagant illnesses from exotic holiday spots."

Moon Souvenirs

No You Do Not Have A Beer Belly: You've just developed a liquid grain storage facility.'

Men and Women's changing rooms

Confusing directions.

Caravan Club shop is selling Hold-Ups.

Vacation on the Moon.

'Never thought I'd enjoy a cricket match so much.'

"I love holiday shopping, but with all the scams this time of year I must be careful."

"I see you've got a new cheese counter."

Tourist Directions

Woman painting a man drowning.

Arctic Caravan Breaks

'We buried Dad in the sand, Mom!'