Tough Love Practitioner Gifts

"It's been a tough season, and you tried your hardest, son. But you're being traded."

Ice Cream Surgeon

"...and do you agree to accept him as he is, and not try to change him?"

"Tell me more about your imposter syndrome."

Junior Doctor.

"I'm diagnosing selfie-steem issues."

'I find the best way to get them to grow up is to buy them a 1-way ticket to Europe, and let them work their way back.'

"Your wife called again about that thing called love - I said you were dealing with it."

"This ride is for parents and their kids."

Playing Doctors.

"Mother believed in tough love. She was always there for me when I needed a cold shoulder to cry on."

'Sorry to interrupt - your monastery is on fire...the IRS wants to talk to you - and something about a missing case of wine.'

"OK - I'll say it again - I love you even more than my p******* hour."

"Race you to the spleen!"

"Let's stop this before we both say a lot of things we mean."

"You've always let me down in this marriage."

"You haven’t earned this."

'Denise, I can read you like a book. Something's bothering you isn't it?'

'Sorry to interrupt, but this is our sixth session and that's your third notepad. When do I get to say something?'

Emotional sabotage animals.

Yoga Class: Position Vacant

"It's not real meditation when you SMIRK like that!"

"Sometimes I think you only married me because I lived next door!"

'There, there, dear -- they're all alike.'

"These feet are fine. You have at least a couple of route marches left in them."

'Mind if I cut in?'

"I know you think I'm tough on you now, son. But you'il be much better prepared for life when I disinherit you."

'For goodness sake, Harry. All the child wants to do is take out your appendix.'

'I'm being a good boy for the sake their marriage.'

"I don't know, I've never tried?"

'It was a wonderful evening, Jack...please don't spoil it by asking for a promotion.'

Cupid HQ. I've been laid off. Everybody is meeting online.

"Is there something you'd like to talk about, Gerald?"

"You mean those were your hopes and dreams?"

"You have to admit, it was funny...even the paramedics were laughing!"