Tough Dog Owner Gifts

'I wanna buy a muzzle.'

'When he's happy he can cool the entire downstairs.'

Dog Walking Services

'That was fun!'

"What's wrong, boy? Is Timmy stuck in the well? Are zombies at your doggy door? A fire? Squirrels are holding your bone hostage? My Spotify stock just tanked?..." "He thinks he's real funny."

"There's really not much to obedience school. Just listen up and do what they say."

"Bad dog! I've told you to always proofread."

'I'm not sure which one is the role model.'

Love a Mutt

"The answer to bone loss is to bury them deeper.'

Cat and dog at a will reading.

"There's something about ripping the stuffing out of a toy that turns me into a wild dog. I'm afraid I actually like that feeling."

MacGyver's Cat: 'You see, I took your bed and two paper clips and made it my bed.'

'Why Sally, you look so fetching with that stick!'

"I've tasted better myself, but you've got to admit the service is good."

'Yes I know I'm intelligent and famous, but I'd trade it all for a good old belly scratching.'

"Looks like a pretty quiet night out there, huh, girl?"

Dogs life

Another reason Chihuahuas hate basketball.

"The bad news is that I backed into a fan. The good news is my owner's a plumber."

'...and remember, son, never throw up on an old carpet...wait until they get a new one!'

"Have you tried barking at the moon?"

"He sits there all day waiting to chase the email man."

"Who's a good boy? You're a good boy."

Epic Battles

"Hurry, stop him!" (Dog running off with bone from man's x-ray).

Dog Obedience School: 'I think we're going to have our work cut out with this one.'

"Just what emotion is your emotional support dog supporting?"

'I just finished the floors, so they better stay clean!'

'Brrr - It is cold out, isn't it fella!?!'

"Would you get me a beer from the refrigerator? Just grab one of the cans on the top shelf. Come on, I do so much for you—all these years, the walks, the food, the chases... Come on! Never mind."

"It makes me want to pee."

Halo Frisbee.

NOVA. Don't worry --- The "vacuum of space" is not that kind of vacuum.

Santa Dog