Touchdown Celebrator Gifts

"My client wants a fifty-per-cent salary boost, a bonus guarantee, and a snappy choreographed victory dance he can do after he makes a touchdown."

'So what do you miss about earthly life.'

Megan Anna Rapinoe

"My older self travels back just to remind me to put the cap back on this pen?"

'OK, everybody, calm down,,,'

"Wordle in two! You hear me? Two!!"

'...However, he is such a heck of a nice guy, we're going to give him the touchdown anyway.'

Input From The Front Office

Planting a Flag on the Summit

American Football.

First Prize!

"Football is too dangerous, Junior. Why not follow my footsteps in a safe sport - chasing investment yield?"

'The Wilsons picked up a quarterback in the off-season. The Riveras picked up a quarterback. The Ludwigs picked up a quaterback...'

Punishment for the kicker.

'I've decided to skip my senior year and go directly into an endless cycle of unrealistic expectations and failure.'

'He's checking with his agent to see if it's okay to score a try!'

"Let's do exactly what these pundits in the halftime report said we should do. If we lose, we'll blame them!"

It's true. Some days I feel like creating a miracle, and some days I just feel like helping a dude catch a touchdown pass.

"Oh, wait. He's on their side."

"You're back! You're really back...!"

At least Sunday is still a holy day.

Smiley Victory Fingers

'He hibernates between superbowls.'

'My turn! Kick me next!!'

Just as he was about to be annihilated, Dirk makes an amazing discovery,

"Junior, there's more to life than winning. There's also getting compensation for closed-head injuries."

Friendly fire!

'Uh-oh ... Manning got hit hard, and he's not getting up.'

"Sometimes I think all this post game analysis has gone too far."

'No slapping, Wilson! We don't start full-contact drills until tomorrow!'

"We´ve licked the Prussians, but how do we convince my therapist?"

Football

"A four-year, $60 million contract and he can't even do a decent end-zone dance!"

Sportsperson is happy with most likes

'Get the stretcher! He's got a mole on his leg that looks a little funky!!'