Torch Relay Participant Pillows

'They asked me to carry it, but every time I light a cigarette I scorch my eyebrows.'

Frederic Auguste Bartholdi

"Oh, oh, it seems they've had a little trouble with the hand-off in lane number three."

'The Torch Holder'.

Beijing Olympics - Treadmill.

'This cave is really damp... and squidgy underfoot'

'Geez, I hate these fun runs!'

"Trust me, you don't want this job."

'Just checking that I've turned off the lights, dear!'

'before you say 'all this will be yours', I don't want it.'

Olympic Sabbath Torch.

Alien abducts Olympic athlete.

"What do you think? Would flaming marshmallows make good torches?"

Skating by torchlight on the Serpentine.

Athlete

'Advice? Yep, take your Olympic torch somewhere else.'

"Congratulations on the discovery. Good luck getting it insured."

'The Olympic torch is certainly making a blazing entrance into the stadium!'

Olympic Torch.

Statue of liberty holding a lighter

'How'd you wind up with two batons?'

"Oh, Oh, it looks like they've had a little trouble with the hand-off in lane three."

Covid Carries the Olympic Torch

Torch Bearer burnt from exploding flame. Staff behind him with petrol can used to fuel up flame.

Olympic torch for sale.

Running Stairs

Help! Made the Olympic trials but couldn't get a product endorsement contract.

'Even the photograph couldn't separate the relay teams...'

Isolation Olympics

Two men holding Olympic torches run in opposite directions

The First Home Lighting Store.

'You're right! It's much more festive using Tiki-Torches.'

'I do think we might have relaxed our 'No Smoking' policy on this one occasion, Mr. Crips. . .'

Trick or treat...

'This is the 'Mother Flame' - three for a pound down the market.'