Toothbrush Philosopher Gifts

Morning Routine

'To grow a good beard, have good dental habits. First, brush with a concave brush to clean the teeth's facial surfaces. Then use a convex brush to reach flat surfaces. Then use a scalloped brush to be chic. Then floss to clean between teeth. Then use ...

Remember to always brush your teeth!

'Stop! Wait 'til he finishes cleaning my teeth!'

'Here's a new toothbrush...I've been using that one on the dog's teeth!'

"Who's God?"

"I believe an effective decay-preventive dentifrice when used a conscientious program of oral hygiene can be of significant value and so does my horse."

"Did I set the table right? Fork, knife, tooth brush?"

'Now, be reasonable about this pay-rise: I could just buy a toothbrush and you would be out of a job...'

'All done, ready for bed: I've cleaned his teeth...'

The Three Doctors.

Mothers Without Borders

'But toothache is the worst!'

'Bloody reincarnation therapy!'

'Dr. Vitsky, D.D.S. ... Yes, here you are. Go right on ahead through those pearly whites up there.'

'Read about Samson & Delilah. . . Better yet - see a live demonstration.'

An artists drinks alcohol while painting on a canvas.

Big, Tall, & Hairy

'I've never slept with a cartoonist before; will it be funny?'

'Brush with Calgote' Hmmm...

'I need a new tooth brush.'

'Tell me, how do you intend taking my tooth out.'

'You're excited about winning a traveling toothbrush kit in a sweepstakes after spending $300 on postage and entering 1,500 contests?'

The Bored Impressionist

'I see the problem.' Car grill looks like teeth.

'I'm an artistic genius, I bet no-one has ever painted a plain old bowl of fruit.'

"You can't leave holes in an agreement, I could run a coach and horses through this....So let's be crystal clear, if you don't clean your toothy pegs, there will be a 15% reduction in story time."

Devil and Angel Fighting over Artist.

'We call her 'the Plaque-inator'. She takes on the tough cleaning jobs. . .'

The mysterious process by which people and their toothbrushes start to look similar.

"Couldn't you find one with softer bristles?"

"Never discuss politics with your barber."

If elected, I promise my beard will not remain in the awkward stage

'Oh! Yes doctor, that tooth, that's the one, yeees, there!'

Passionate about Halitosis