Tongue-in-cheek Environmentalist Gifts

'I feel really close to nature with the wood-burning stove.'

Tree funeral.

"Hi there! - I'm the world's first eco-friendly comedian... All My Jokes Are Recycled...!"

No, no, this is Terry's ark, Noah's is three arks down.

'It's an extinction notice.'

Winter Weather.

"Plastic straws. No fish were spared in the making of this product."

"I've been dumping bodies here for years, and it seems to me that the sea level is rising."

'Don't worry boss, it's probably archaic!'

Recycling bottle bank.

"If there is a heaven, why do we end up as fossil fuel?"

'I was hoping traffic would ease up after the polar ice cap melted.'

Trump to Build Wall

Have food. Need toilet paper

"Brilliant! And then all they have to do is stop them flying at night."

This is where Brent council sends you

'Apparently you haven't heard, Hawkins, about things going paperless!'

Cactus Huggers

"I'm doing my part to conserve electricity."

"The president wants me to stay on as unemployed."

Food Chain Gang

'It's a shame that valuable water gets wasted to wash cars or to take showers. It should be used responsible and for useful purposes only - for example to make whiskey.'

Global Warming.

"Why the torch?" "It's the solar power for the bus stop!"

Sign - Do not feed the bears. Bear - 'Those signs have caused a substantial reduction in weight, a lowering of blood pressure and a significant drop in cholesterol...'

'On the plus side, you won't have to worry about me getting into an expensive college.'

"They're nice, but not as efficient as my coal-powered chimes."

'And just what studies show that losing weight causes global warming?'

'The Mayor is going to be thrilled -- I found a way to fill potholes with toxic waste!'

Picnic blankets with pop up trees.

North Pole with Sundial.

Cutting Down Trees to Build the Ark

"What a gloriously sunny day...! I must get in the garden and burn something..."

'They can't help smelling like that -- they're biodegradable.'