Toilet Seat Debater Pillows

'And remember, lady, down here the toilet seat stays up!'

Church leader at desk has 3 boxes marked 'Black', 'White' and 'Gray Area'.

"When faced with a tricky ethical issue, I always ask the question, 'What's in it for me?'"

'How do we SLEEP at night?'

'I know it's controversial, but my calculations prove beyond doubt that a nod is BETTER than a wink.'

'Forget it. Bioethics doesn't apply to us.'

Jesus Christ, Health Insurance CEO

"In this one, references to everything have been deleted."

'Naughty? Nice? Santa, I don't deal in absolutes.'

"When we tested this medication on dogs, nobody noticed any side effects."

"There is a medical use for marijuana. I sold it to pay my tuition at medical school."

Science Snobs

'If you start granting amnesty for people for following their conscience, pretty soon everyone will be following his conscience.'

Man milks a book.

"...And since the cure is worse than the disease, we can make more money by developing a cure for that!"

'As we all know, the appearance of honesty is the best policy....'

"My company sells military goods and information to unsavory characters around the world, and donates 100% of our profits to local charities!"

Car number plate reads - 'My multi-national corporation right or wrong.'

Always a popular motive: Hunter and Prey.

'Save the Smallpox Virus'

'There are some subjects that are off limits...CEO bonuses...Overtime pay...Business ethics...'

'Our newest board member wants a ban on animal testing except for rodents.'

'With this new scientific development you can replace your whole herd with one giant cow!'

The ethics professor weeding his garden.

"Oh our assistant, he was donated by a pharmaceutical company."

"Hey... we can't use this...he's coughing up false intelligence.'

"We went with an open floor plan because it can really facilitate a shared sense of hysteria."

Clones are people two!

'Money isn't everything...but it should be.'

'And what if I did doctor the documents? I'm a doctor.'

'Let the minutes show that Fenwick brought up the subject of corporate ethics.'

Make him take 16 of these a day until we feel a bit better about what we're doing to him.