Toilet Paper Debater Pillows

"Obviously, the toilet paper should go over the roll."

"Sorry lad, ye can't be having' me pot o' toilet paper."

Coronavirus: Consequences for the economy!

There's a Facebook group for everyone... "Even Toilet Paper Mummies!"

The contract was not worth the paper it was written on, which considering the paper was not a good sign.

I break for toilet paper

"After being shorted on his bonus, Earl the maintenance man decided to remove all the toilet paper from the executive washrooms."

"No not the puppy please"

Have food. Need toilet paper

Do what you can to flatten the curve

'Toilet paper, Lassie! Fetch toilet paper! Stupid mutt!'

A hand reaches frantically out a trailer bathroom door trying to grab a roll of toilet paper that's rolling away and down the aisle.

A new species just discovered in the Softwood Forest...The TP tree.

Creation of Adam

"Hi, Honey, I went to that new wholesale store...and, boy, did I get a deal on toilet paper!"

The Thinker Thinks of Toilet Roll.

'And remember, lady, down here the toilet seat stays up!'

Over. Under. Sideways. Kid.

"I can't come out, Mary is having one of her marathon cries."

Flush Direct

'I see you approve of our switch to Ultra Soft.'

'It was the only white thing I had.'

'You're so soft today. Did you switch to 2-ply?'

"I figured my family could use a padded cell. Actually, I just buy toilet paper in bulk."

COWS: Cows weekly shop

"Measure twice. Wipe once."

Bears Going to the Bathroom in Woods.

'The newspaper reckons there's a shortage of toilet paper.' - 'What would we do without newspapers?'

"Here, try this on." "But mom, everyone's wearing three ply. I'll be a freak."

Toilet paper calendar

"Watch your step, it's a sure sign bears are around."

"Well, we've just run out of toilet paper, but I guess we can use our stock options instead."

'Procter and Gamble? I dunno, sounds risky - what if everyone stops using toilet paper?'

"My neighbor's house got TPed, and doubled in value."

Toilet Paper Hill