Toilet Break Tactician T-Shirts

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Personal Potty Trainer

'A representative will be with you in twelve minutes... so, if you have to go to the bathroom, please go now...'

'...'Fire the coach'...'Fire the coach'...'Fire the coach'...'

"But mom, all you said was 'get all your stuff up off the floor!' "

Implement operation 'KILL ALL PLUMBERS'!

'I'm trying to toilet train them.'

Papa's Pizza delivered in under 30 minutes.

A hand reaches frantically out a trailer bathroom door trying to grab a roll of toilet paper that's rolling away and down the aisle.

'You never compliment me when it's tidy so I figured you wouldn't notice when it's a tip!'

"Hey Rudy, you've been in there for over an hour. You OK in there?" "I think I'm dying here." "What? D'you need me to call 911?" "I don't think that'll help." "I just need to build more pikemen and cavalry and buy a defense boost before the enemy's march reaches my city." "Get off your phone!!!" "I'm saving a kingdom here! It's important!"

'Nice decorating. I like the clothes and toys everywhere...and the half eaten sandwich really ties it all together!'

"Measure twice. Wipe once."

Potty Training.

'I warned you to stop snarfing down the free samples!'

"You're getting a time-out because Mommy needs a time-out."

"The pizza guy wants to know what floor we're on."

"I really really have to pee."

'Looks like we lucked out.'

'...And they gave me fifteen more minutes for resisting arrest!'

Toilet training for an adult.

Fighting corona

"So here we see how Covid-19 is also damaging the brain."

Shelf Isolation

"I think the flush is broken."

'Watch your step in there!'

"Can you put it on pause for a moment, Eric? I'd like to get a word in edgeways."

Pocket Money Negotiations

Toilet paper shortage

"I'm sorry, mom. I couldn't hold it."

'I found clothes in the closet, under the bed, and behind the couch. That's not what I meant by separating your laundry.'

This is the 4th time this week!! It's almost as if someone's sabotaging it so it won't flush... Anyhow, I need to set up another service appointment.

Again I'm sorry, Judith, but there's somethin' wrong with that boy, He hasn't had a drink in weeks, Yet here I am, about to stop for the 4th time so he can use the restroom,