Toe-tally Funny Folks Pillows

That's a nasty outgoing toenail you've got there.'

Podiatry. If the frostbite was any worse we'd have to amputate. You just barely stayed out of the "toe away" zone!

'Your Majesty, the peasants are out of bread!', 'Then let them eat low-carb stuff.'

"...and the King Cholesterol Meal comes with a side order of CPR."

'You've got lot toe!'

Potatoes.

Man eating his meal with his feet.

"You talkin' to me?"

TV dinners: regular and widescreen

"There. Straight from the organic veggie patch. The world's most expensive carrot."

Ordinarily I'd suggest we'd talk our way out...If only we weren't so God damn tasty!

Soup on a stick

"Guys, guys! Let's take this from the top. Who ordered the chicken nuggets...?"

"We sell beer, but it's non-alcoholic."

The cake diet.

'Hang on a minute, the small print says: 'Endorsed by the French Government'...'

Sushi For Men...

Mom's Diner: "Just like mom used to make."

'My god, he's insane.'

'You have mistle-TOE.'

"You see, I told you it was worth the climb! Your first 'bird's eye view'. . ."

Meatball of the Gods.

Corn and Bunion plants.

A Toe Jam with The Hang Nails.

Walk the dog.

'The wife and I have decided to nominate our weekly drink-free days as tomorrow and the day after tomorrow.'

An exciting online development for people with foot fetishes: Footbook.

'It's the worse case of in-growing toe nails I've ever seen, nurse!'

'Had I'd known it would be such a long walk I wouldn't have worn heels.'

"Mmmmmm....meat and two veg!"

"How are you fixed for sandals?"

Fish pedicures - a woman with her feet in goldfish bowls, with the fish complaining about what they have to eat since the beauty craze took off.

Dogs in restaurant: 'I'll have the fresh slippers, the pan-fried postman's trousers and I'll finished with the baked homework.'

Rex, I overheard Master say he had a Hot Dog for lunch!

'What exactly is this darling, in case I have to describe to later to a doctor?'