Title Tinkerers Gifts

Steinbeck - stuck on the title page (Grapes of Wrath).

"How married are you to 'Merry Christmas' in the title?"

I'm refining the title for my self-help book. Right now, it's called: Shut Yer Yapper and be Happy, Loser. What if I add a subtitle: A Single Step to Total Fulfillment and @#$% Joy! Too upbeat? Exactly what was I thinking.

'Field Marshall chairman, if you don't mind.'

Pearls Before Swine is not a terribly savvy name

"God sounds too pretentious I prefer 'The Original Stay-At-Home Dad'."

Pounding speeds up the computer.

Robot Parts $5

Robots search for people's personal information in the cloud.

'My penmanship has really improved since I got a laser printer.'

"I'm grounded. I forgot to delete the car's computer history after we did those crop circles on Earth."

The Computer Bore

'First you forget logarithms. Then you forget how to do long division. Then the multiplication table begins to go...'

"This software will cut my workload in half, so I purchased two."

Needed Inventions: An Airbag To Protect The Viewer Against A Really Lousy Program.

Rejected Titles For The Canadian National Anthem.

"...and before you embark upon life's journey, could one of you help me with my laptop?"

Rocking horse

The Hobby Store

"Once I connect with my server over there, I can turn my lamp on and off."

Early cyborg.

"I thought you were making a coffee table?"

'A computer is only as good as the people who are employed to replace the people who were made redundant by the computer.'

"He's on screen saver. Just tap him."

'I solved the problem of dead zones on my cell phone with a personal satellite,'

Gadget geek.

Mouse in a hamster wheel.

"Siri, who’s the fairest of them all?"

Modern kite for wind energy.

The Not-So Smart Meter

'Hon? Did your phone go dead? Hello?'

A massive ship pulls in in Central Park.

"It's a smart hamper that sucks up clothes. My mom claims I leave my clothes on the floor, so she has it follow me wherever I go."

'I think I see what's making your funny noise.'

Bicycle sat nav.