Tick-tackler Gifts

Farmer to son: 'For heaven's sake Jeb! Get Bessie out of that tall grass now! Can't you see she's full of ticks?!'

Concert Pianist.

Piano Recital

"I'm too busy to be stressed."

"Careful Hank, this one still has some fight in him."

"Eventually the instrument becomes an extension of your body."

Paddling upstream to save a $1.79 lure snagged on a log.

Lyme Disease Research Lab

'Apparently, my wine-tasting computer liked the '86 Haut Brion a bit too much - it didn't leave any for us.'

'Court is recessed until the big hand is on the three.'

Keyboard player

'I've been charged with evading jury duty.'

'Quit whining, Sid, and walk it off! I'm not falling for that pulled muscle thing again!'

'I hate these purists who play Bach without any pedal'

"My client pleads not guilty, by reason that everyone else is doing it."

'That's a bit better. Persistence pays off - although, not as well as it did when I was your age.'

'George, I know it's your favorite lure, give it up.'

'The main reason I took up the piano was, it's the only musical instrument that gives you a place to set your wine.'

"There is an easier way to ensure that our pet doesn't get fleas or ticks."

Fined Dining

Dear Bertha - I'd write more often, but I always seem to be out of ink! Love, Oggy

'I found out what makes him tick - he'd swallowed a watch!'

Emmanuel Ax

Beware of Watchdog.

Predatory Pianos.

Concert pianist on his way to work.

"O.K., I'm going to demonstrate the proper way to lie to me about flossing."

'Piano Player'

"Clarence really knew how to tickle the ivories."

"Eww! A tick!"

"I am trying to keep it low key."

Piano Shop.

'No-one can avoid cuts!'

Trolley Rage.

Organ Player