Thrift Hunting Hero Gifts

Yard sale sign states: Profits Go 4 Gas.

Thrift: New way to eat eggs (avoid needless transport costs).

'We are entering an era of thrift, so in place of champagne and canapes, there will be a jumble sale.'

"I love these old decorations!"

"I just..."

That's supposed to say garage sale!

When Tia Carmen says... "I got it for a very good price!" it means...she stopped at a garage sale on the way home.

"I'm on a tight budget. Make it look like I cut at myself."

"1. Flimsig used pallets, old foam 2. Stinkum goat wool 3. Beetup recycled lumber 4. Riskig kerosene lamp 5. Stupor hand blown by Nils 6. Smokum found on beach in Mendocino 7. Woblig 100% driftwood"

'We grow our food, have solar energy, use bikes instead of car...now if we could only stop buying knickknacks!'

"I need something that says, 'Let's party,' but in a fiscally responsible manner."

Vintage Dresses: Your Frock Exchange

Crap others threw out

'The sick economy isn't why J.B.has cut back on spending. He always was a tightwad.'

"Secondhand books, reheated coffee"

Buy Back the Junk We Bought at Your Garage Sale

'It took a six hour operation to remove this fiver from your fist.'

"Once again, how little did you pay for this room?"

Rising Housing Costs vs Wages.

Electricity Bills

"Times are perfect for us masochists!..."

'A great location and only one step from the beach.'

"I'm going to look for a mortgage...I may be some time!"

'There's something satisfying about clearing out the loft and taking it all to a car boot sale to make room for all the rubbish you buy there with the proceeds.'

Man debating the price in a resteurant

Thrift: instead of 1 tap for hot water and 1 tap for cold, 1 tap for warm water.

"I only drink on special occasions. Like when some body else is buying."

'For Sale Used Only Once.'

"The only thing we seem to have in your price range is a bird box in Billericay."

"The valuation of my business includes its goodwill."

Second hand store: 'LEFTOVERS AGAIN!'

Garage Sales Anonymous

Thrift: Live in the sea, make friends with a whale, and shower for free.

What were you thinking when you bought this re-sale shop.

Stock Wanted