Thoughtful Pet Owners Gifts

'Chewing bones? Hunting cats? Biting mailmen? C'mon, kid! Time to see the really important things in life!'

Man on exercise bike with dog on treadmill

"Sometimes ... I just want to run away."

"I want him to have the serenity to accept the things he can't pee on, the patience to pee on the things he can outside, and the wisdom to know the difference." "But I'll probably just take him to a trainer."

"That's the preacher's dog."

'Quick, I'll give you a piggyback ride home, otherwise, we'll get in trouble for being late...'

'What a bunch of control freaks!'

'All cats have 4 legs and fur. I have 4 legs and fur...It's too hard to think anymore.'

Good Dog!

Pets are not only good companions, they're good excuses.

"I know they're treating you kindly but are they treating you ethically?"

"Actually, I would rather have a dog. It's just that we need the eggs."

'I've been fixed even though there wasn't anything wrong with me.'

Dog Thoughts

'Stressed out dogs relax through Yoga.'

'Have you put her on the strict diet I prescribed?'

"We agree - 3 words you don't want to hear from the vet - fleas, shots, and diet."

"Enough with the criticism!"

'The animal psychiatrist said don't bother him with dog things- he doesn't know he's a dog!'

"I bark, therefore I am."

'I can talk to animals.'

'He's a very compassionate cat. He never kills any of the animals he catches.'

'Relax... breathe... visualize you inner dog treat...'

"Why don't you use your litter box?"

'Heal!' 'Heel!'

'Does 'Meow' really stand for the 'Moral Equivalent Of War?''

Junk food for dogs.

"Stop worrying if you're a good dog or a bad dog. Just be the best dog you can be."

Dog eating near dogfood bag: 'Now Gluten Free'

'...And this is no man's land!'

'Has this slop you fed me been checked for e-coli?'

Dog to vet: 'Be honest. How many more flea and tick seasons do I have left?'

'If you insist on feeding your dog table scraps, fine...'

Thank You

'He doesn't smoke around the kids or at home, but he doesn't seem to worry about MY passive smoking!'