Mindful Pet Parent Gifts

'Stressed out dogs relax through Yoga.'

"Sometimes ... I just want to run away."

"I want him to have the serenity to accept the things he can't pee on, the patience to pee on the things he can outside, and the wisdom to know the difference." "But I'll probably just take him to a trainer."

'I know you're worried about Tibby, Mrs. Lutz, but we simply don't allow people to stay overnight with their pets.'

"Want me to talk to the squirrel's mother, or would you prefer to handle it on your own?"

"Who's a good boy? You're a good boy."

"That's the preacher's dog."

The best relationships are silent.

'All cats have 4 legs and fur. I have 4 legs and fur...It's too hard to think anymore.'

Witch: 'I've mellowed. Instead of black, do you have a gray cat?'

"See? This is what I'm talking about! If you always show how happy you are to see everyone, you give them all the power in the relationship!"

Pets are not only good companions, they're good excuses.

'I've been fixed even though there wasn't anything wrong with me.'

"I went through hell to get them adopted."

"We don't have a time-out chair in our Classroom Community, that's our mindfulness chair."

'No thanks. I'm just looking...'

"Choose wisely. Your choice will be the answers to security questions for the rest of your life."

"Buck up, go home and be nice to the new kitty."

Cat yoga

"Eat grass 'til you puke, then call me in the morning."

"Shall I cancel the Henderson meeting? You have walkies scheduled at three."

'It appears that your son's problems stem from attention deficit disorder.'

". . .What's this world coming to?"

'I'm declawed, but I found an app that'll scratch up the furniture for me.'

I assume obedience class was a washout then.

"I bark, therefore I am."

'The animal psychiatrist said don't bother him with dog things- he doesn't know he's a dog!'

'Look, Doctor. I just want him cured. I'm not interested in what's wrong with him, so skip the lab work."

"In my day, dogs slept outside in a doghouse." "But... this is nice."

'Relax... breathe... visualize you inner dog treat...'

Now, my son, visualize yourself removing your diaper and sitting on the potty

"They know we hate water. They put food in the water. It's sick."

"It's just the virtue signal - unfortunately, it doesn't do much."

'Just because you've got a cat-flap doesn't mean you can come and go as you please.'

'Does 'Meow' really stand for the 'Moral Equivalent Of War?''