Thoughtful Eater Gifts

Think Tank Cafeteria. Any food for thought today?

'You think ideas are contained in food?'

'Oh... I assure you... no animals were harmed in making these delicious porky worky sausages.'

"If so many things taste like chicken, why did God make chickens?"

"I love this place—its food, its ambience, and its political goals."

What do you mean you prefer the sound of the sign of the right?! What part of 'either way we're dead' do you not understand?

View to the Future

"Wait—did you procure that worm humanely?"

"Wild-caught, farm-raised, lab-grown, beach-found, or aquarium-harvested."

'I'm a vegetarian.' - 'If it's so wrong to eat animals, why are they made out of meat?'

'May future generations forgive you for eating that sausage...'

'Is it guilt that when you eat us that we are no longer called pigs but bacon, pork chops or ham?'

Man Eating Minimalist Meal

"Is the asparagus farm-raised or wild-caught?"

The Origins of Everything

'I'm from P.E.T.A.. Are you the one who called about animal-rights abuses?'

"The lobster dinner is thirty eight dollars, or for ten dollars extra you can have him returned to the sea."

'Now, think hard about it: Do you want to be known as the one who ate the last Dodo?'

'Personally I can't see anything wrong with GM crops!'

'What are you eating now?'

"Being vegan or vegetarian isn't enough anymore. From now on I will only cook stuff I stepped in on the sidewalk."

'It's going to be a vegan.'

"We would like to be genetically modified to taste like Brussels sprouts."

'And we'll give you all the carcinogens you can eat.'

"On second thought, just give me the ham and forget the roast beef."

A boy who loves cows/burgers

"All our vegetables are organic, ethically sourced and stunned before being boiled."

Children's Dream Dinners: Superhero Special

"Is it free-range?"

'Are you sure these sprouts aren't GM?.'

'Rob is a vegan.'

Weight Loss Counselor, out for a 400 calorie lunch.

"Sure, ha ha, it’s all ‘free-range’ beef."

"Nothing is organic, local or sustainable. Now, can we get started?"

'Preparing free-range chicken requires an extremely patient chef.'