Thoughtful Eater T-Shirts

'You think ideas are contained in food?'

'Oh... I assure you... no animals were harmed in making these delicious porky worky sausages.'

"If so many things taste like chicken, why did God make chickens?"

"I love this place—its food, its ambience, and its political goals."

What do you mean you prefer the sound of the sign of the right?! What part of 'either way we're dead' do you not understand?

"Wait—did you procure that worm humanely?"

View to the Future

"Wild-caught, farm-raised, lab-grown, beach-found, or aquarium-harvested."

'I'm a vegetarian.' - 'If it's so wrong to eat animals, why are they made out of meat?'

Man Eating Minimalist Meal

'May future generations forgive you for eating that sausage...'

'Is it guilt that when you eat us that we are no longer called pigs but bacon, pork chops or ham?'

"Is the asparagus farm-raised or wild-caught?"

'Now, think hard about it: Do you want to be known as the one who ate the last Dodo?'

'I'm from P.E.T.A.. Are you the one who called about animal-rights abuses?'

"The lobster dinner is thirty eight dollars, or for ten dollars extra you can have him returned to the sea."

The Origins of Everything

'Personally I can't see anything wrong with GM crops!'

'It's going to be a vegan.'

"Being vegan or vegetarian isn't enough anymore. From now on I will only cook stuff I stepped in on the sidewalk."

'What are you eating now?'

"We would like to be genetically modified to taste like Brussels sprouts."

'And we'll give you all the carcinogens you can eat.'

A boy who loves cows/burgers

"On second thought, just give me the ham and forget the roast beef."

Children's Dream Dinners: Superhero Special

"Is it free-range?"

'Are you sure these sprouts aren't GM?.'

'What do you have that hasn't been cloned?'

"I just found a lacto-vegan restaurant and Janet from accounts says she's FRUITAIAN!"

Mind, Body, Spirit (and Food Court).

'Beef Counselor - mad cow, foot and mouth, diet, nutrition, ethics'

"Nothing is organic, local or sustainable. Now, can we get started?"

"Sure, ha ha, it’s all ‘free-range’ beef."

"Now make sure your heat is high enough to sear your putrid meat quickly."