Those With A Sense Of Humor About Healthcare Gifts

Infant care worker is exhausted from sex injuries at hospital.

'Nurse, why is there always a fly in my ointment?'

"I stand corrected."

Kid with plaster cast being sawn off.

"These are my fish cymbalta, otezla, skyrizi, vraylar and stelara!"

To encourage patients to take their medication, Dr. Gratner brought in a sketch artist to show them what they will look like in six months without meds.

'Time for your pills.'

'If it doesn't itch, why worry?'

'We don't have a cure for your ailment but there is an appropriate app available.'

The importance of paying attention in med school.

"Get another opinion if you wish, Mr. Von Flip...But I'm confident it will still come up ' heads - we operate.'"

"We can give you enough medication to alleviate the pain, but not enough to make it fun."

The GPC has written to ministers about how children can be more involved with the NHS

'Snap out of it.'

"Norton! Put that back at once!"

"I'd like to approve a second opinion but your HMO considers that experimental medicine."

'This could be a very expensive operation — I'm going to refer you to the Federal Government.'

Prescriptions: "Jack of Clubs?"

'Have you heard about the new Medicare drug plan called plan C? Medicare gives you $30 for a bus ticket to Canada!'

'The Doctor says you can be discharged - so I've brought you a list of jobs you can do when you get home!'

'Like I said - It's non invasive surgery.'

'You need some stress.'

'You do have catastrophic insurance, but it only applies in case of invasion from outer space.'

"I've heard that your medication can grow extra nipples, but I wouldn't worry about that if I were you..."

Flyingdoctor's receptionist.

'Mr. Hillshire seems to have taken a turn for the 'wurst'.'

'I told you nothing was out of joint but your nose.'

Nurse holding giant pill tells patient, 'Relax. It's chewable.'

Man to other coming out of Alternative Health Club: 'I had total joint replacement - they switched me from hemp to medical marijuana.'

He said he loved her for her brain but was her appendix he was always taking out.

Doctor's poker.

Fish swimming around inside drip.

"... And who asked for your opinion, I'd like to know?!"

Flu Drugs.

Healthy Eating Casualties