Therapy Satire Lover Gifts

'Even my inflatable dolls have headaches!'

"I'm afraid you could go at any time."

"And the letterbox version, how does that make you feel."

'I don't know...they all look like cows to me.'

'I'd like a second opinion, doctor.'

'Nurse, I said x-ray, not microwave.'

Beer $.50. I've had lot of psychological therapy, but none of it seems to help. Maybe you

"I feel your pain level."

'I'm afraid it's bad news Mr.Hooper, I've just got the report on your finances.'

"Albert the Great—what a joke."

Heimlich maneuver, Gastric bypass surgery, Liver transplant.

"Great news, Mr. Corrigan. That large, life-threatening lump we removed from your back turned out to be your lawyer."

'Care to join in some of my avoidance behaviour?'

"It wasn't a farming accident. She just bit my head off again."

Dr. Flagg's Worst Nightmare

"Does it hurt when my attorney does this?"

"Sometime I feel people go out of their way just to scare me."

"My blood type...it's the type that doesn't like to exercise."

'Don't worry. We still have a few more treatment options available.'

"Your test results are perfect and there is nothing wrong with you. We will operate on you for it tomorrow."

'We're like one big family tree... that's why everyone is in therapy.'

"Teach me not to care."

'I can't make you younger...odometer tampering is against the law.'

I've been feeling sluggish lately.

'Pencil on couch being psycho analysed.'

"I am not the famous heart surgeon, but I am in his medical group."

Pay Hospital Bill Here.

Psychiatrist: Mind over matter filing trays.

'If you begin to feel unwell, start or stop taking aspirin...'

"Why do you feel like you're lost?"

Psychiatrist to man dressed in baseball jersey: 'You've never gotten over the fact your father wouldn't play catch with you?'

'We auto mechanics get no respect!'

Eye, ear, nose, throat and loans to pay the bills.

'Life's little wonders are too big for me.'

"Tell me Mr. Jones. Does it hurt when I do this?"