Therapeutic Conversations Gifts

'Mr. Scrooge, I think we should talk a bit more about this dream you had...'

"Let's just say I have a pre-existing condition."

"What I'd give for a stimulating conversation..."

Very Difficult Conversations

"I have a recurring nightmare that I've taken a test, and the professor won't give me an 'A'."

"Remember back in the day when I was a real heartbreaker?" "Riiight... now the only thing you break is wind."

Correct Comics *Drawn By A Vegetarian On Acid-Free Recycled Paper In A Drug-Free Environment

'What sort of wines do you like?' ... 'Powerful ones!'

"How about a hand."

'I'm down to a pack of neuroses a day.'

'You've got the wrong idiot, number.'

Dialogue

'The Grand Jury doesn't understand me...'

"I just feel like I'm constantly disappointing parents everytime I appear on report cards."

Shallow End (Slightly innocuous statements) - Deep End (a little more weighty)

"Of course, that's just my opinion. If you want my professional opinion it will cost you."

'The trouble with Nigel is that he's so changeable. One minute I love him and the next minute I loathe him.'

"So has this obsession about your weight ever led to thoughts of suicide?"

Santa uses his interviewing skills on his second job, too.

'Who's a pretty boy! Is that all you've got to say?'

"Most men lead lives of quiet desperation. Frankly, it beats Pandora."

'Therapy in L.A.'

'I'll never forget you, Vince -- My therapist says it would be counterproductive to try.'

'Life isn't fair! Most of the stuff I worried about over the years never even happened!'

"Do you feel you were loved as a tadpole?"

'It's funny - I'm a Bourbon, but I've always preferred Scotch.'

A lesson in wit

Young girl asks young boy what time he wakes in the morning

'What's the difference between solitude and loneliness, doctor?'

'I told you he had a temper.'

"Adolescence can be a very trying time, Mr. Alcorn."

"I had that dream again where I kill my Shrink."

I'm beginning to regret the hearing aids.

"You might be poor and ugly but you're the only one who didn't blather about politics and climate change after ten minutes. What's your name? Marry me!"