Theatrical Joker Pillows

"Clearly it's the silly season."

"You don't seem to know your lines." "That's because I'm an understudy."

Totally Nude Hand Puppets.

Night of the Latkes

Child laughs while making farting sound under arm. Dad says, 'Isn't it nice when they find something they're good at?

Get crazy once in a while

"How about we write a song combining Brexit with unrequited love?"

"Ok... for today I want a 500-word essay on what you know about nothing."

'Want to freak her out? Stare over her shoulder without blinking for 10 minutes.'

Never pick a fight with a comedian.

"Maybe we should just let heaven and nature sing."

'I've heard all about you. Jayne says you're quite the prankster.'

"Everytime you touch me, I get frostbite!"

'Cows have bells because their horns don't work.'

"Harold, stop sucking in your stomach when the girls walk by. You're going to hurt yourself."

"Out, damn'd Spot, out I say! Ha Ha Ha Ha!"

'Moses, you'd better be in that bathtub!!'

'The most moving part, for me, is when they explain how to fuse the main pipe to the power hose.'

'Yup, cannon in D.'

Ice-Cube-IV

'I'm surprised the boss isn't in here checking up on us!'

Toilet humour

Here lies BoBo the Clown

Adult Absence Notes.

'Let it go, will you? -- That whoopie cushion incident was years ago!'

'If you ask me, toys are getting far too realistic!'

Keats's heart aches, and a drowsy numbness pains his sense.

"Come on guys, my jokes aren't that bad!"

Santa Claws...

'Good book?'

"What do you mean, you 'feel funny'?"

'You again? OK, pal... I'm deleting you and this time you're going to stay deleted!' ~ the screen saver of Dorian Gray.

"He claims to be self aware but he clearly can't read a room."

"First of all, this conversation never happened."

Skywriter's Block