Thanksgiving Humor Fan Gifts

"And then they literally have a parade."

Trump, Giuliani: oops, wrong turkey

'She always hated cooking and cleaning, so we were surprised when she became a Thanksgiving dinner and a feather duster.'

"Better bring me another cookie. The last one fell in the water."

"Damn. I think I missed the turn for Bethlehem."

'The ghost walks this passage every night Monday to Friday. He has weekends off.'

Mrs. Claus has a ladies night out.

Elfie Stick

Frozen Turkey: "I hate to bother you on a holiday but I'm freezing out here. Do you have a heated enclosed space I could rest inside for four to five hours?"

Happy Holidays from Sanitary Claus!

The Brothers Grime

"I prefer to talk to Mrs. Claus. She doesn't care if I'm naughty or nice."

Try me/try me/try me...

"You see, it's perfectly safe to tease him..."

'I'm the ghost of Christmas future. I'm hammered, can we do this later...?'

"Uh Oh! Jehovah's"

"How could we be short? You had enough chocolate for everyone on our list!"

Well... Tis the season to be jolly!

Evil elves trying to take advantage of Christmas tree fairies.

"I think I preferred it before he became an equal-opportunity employer."

Beer Parasol.

"I could get used to working remotely."

“He’s timid, very shy. I rescued him from some wacko who tried to steal Christmas.”

"My favorite part of the story was when Prince Charming kissed Sleeping Beauty and she totally rebooted."

"I'm you from the future! Or the past. I've completely lost track of time."

"We can do this the easy way or we can do it the hard way ..."

"For the last time, we never need the route with the fewest turns."

'Joe has been partying hard!'

"I fell to the ground from a height of about two metres when I was born: My very first stunt!"

"Well, you were late and her boyfriend didn't turn up for their wedding, so....."

'No sharing gifts! You get the Teddy Bear, he gets the bone.'

Father Christmas Painting Robins.