Thanksgiving Coordinator Pillows

What're you doing for Thanksgiving, little buddy? Having a huge party. It'll be full of turkey, cranberry sauce, wine, eggnog, football, and friends and family who love me dearly. Oh, good. I was afraid you'd be alone all day playing video games. "Turkey Slaughter VI" is no ordinary game. You're coming to my place.

Grace For Flies

"Be sure and eat your frozen vegetables."

Turkey Autopsy

Happy Turkey Day!

'Tom will coordinate our pre-holiday point-of-purchase displays and Mark will coordinate our post holiday point-of-return displays.'

'Santa is the delivery man, I'm the CEO. Do you know what a CEO is, Lisa?'

"Oh, as long as he needs you, Santa's a great guy. But once things slow down and he wants a little vacation time with Mrs. C., it's 'goodbye North Pole, hello crappy temp job!'"

"Wait a minute- these are just the ten commandments of perfect mashed potatoes."

'This month I'll be cooked & my bones ripped apart in a wishing contest.'

Before and After Holiday Diet

'Let's see,,, You're answering prayers until 9:30,, Your Armageddon meeting's been pushed to 2:00 and it looks like your speaking engagement in Mrs, Ingersol's head is postponed 'til Thursday,'

"He bought a thermometer for me, and I'm not even sick."

'We'd like a quiet table for 47.'

Hospital recycling bank.

'The train due to arrive at platform 2 will now arrive at platform 19.'

Thanksgiving Turkey Weight and Fortune

Turkey tries using a trick t-shirt to avoid being selected for dinner.

'Could I borrow your giant scissors for a minute? I cancelled payment on this giant check and I need to cut it up.'

Retailers Tech Expo. A customer just passed a card with an embedded chip by the sensor to complete the purchase! They wave goodbye to their money!

'Hey, Fred, what are you doing for Thanksgiving?'

"What are you cooking for Thanksgiving, Tia Carmen?"

"Cuttin' out the middle man!"

Father Christmas dishing out money for the retailers

"The baby apologises for missing the Christening, he had an urgent appointment."

A turkey holds up a sign reading "Repent!"

"Most emphatic rejection of foreign tissue I've ever seen!"

2020. Anything Goes.

'Hello, is that the temp agency? Now listen, I specifically asked for Elves!'

"Look, we've got to be proactive to survive this year!"

The Horn O' Plenty Quintet

'That's not very motherly.'

''Kale'? - Did we join the Vegetable of the Month Club or something?'

"Three Wild Turkeys."

I'd skip that one - It's gonna be all dried out.